Hope

'You can open your eyes now!'
Slowly, at first squinting I try to take in the sight. Glaring sunlight floods my eyes. The wide beach spreading as far as I can see, and the rushing waves of the sea beyond it. The calm hush of the waves is like a whisper opposed to the rush and the racket of people on the hot sand.
'C'mon, drop those, and let's go!'
She tugs on my hand, so I do as she said. I drop my backpack to the ground, and follow her lead as she undresses down to her bathing suit. Getting rid of all the cloth, as fast as I can, trying to keep up with her... Blinded by taking off my t-shirt, for a second I lose sight of her. I search for her silhouette in the crowd... There! There she is, running towards the water! I follow suite, running to catch up to her.
'Come, lazy-bones, come and catch me!' She yells as she splashes the first steps into the water. A few paces behind, I take a deep breath, run past her and dive in, splashing the salty cool water all over her. Coming up for air, I can hear her giggling behind me, and before I turn, she jumps on my back, taking me back down into the water.
'It's been a long time, hasn't it? One year... too long for you to be away from the sea.' I nod silently, and after some pondering reply: 'You know, it's our fifth year here... Summer wouldn't make sense without this.'

Above & Beyond – Hope

Just a Dream

A story almost at an end... That which has been my life for more than three years now... It just remains to be seen if there is anything left to be written.

You've gone away from me, leaving only the bitter promise of friendship behind. It was not over... Not for me it wasn't. I promised myself I wouldn't stop fighting. But I realized that, at some point it became too much. Too little was left to be done, too little to be saved. So we broke off, and took each our own path. The road we'd traveled together for so long, was now split apart like a tree struck by lightning. Without warning, without a way to mend the hurt. You would just let me drop. And all because I skipped a brief few events... You'd changed; that's what you said. I wasn't there... Why weren't you here? Why weren't we together? But most importantly, why didn't you tell me you needed me?

It's over now. All that's left are the memories. And all my feelings cut off and bleeding. They all told me it had to happen sometime. They all said I would suffer, and that in time it would get better. Perhaps. But that won't be soon. I know... Because I feel you still with me. Because I still long for your touch. Because every time the door opens I startle thinking you've come back. Time and again I'd rush to see if that was you, passing shadow at the corner of my eye. But you're not there. It's just my mind not wanting to adjust to a new reality. The new reality you've shaped out for me when you left. What's there left for me now, since you were all there was to me for so long? Everything reminds me of you. Because there is nothing left from before. I made you a part of everything I had. You'd become a part of me. And now, here I stand cut in half,... alone and naked of the love you wrapped me in not so long ago.

In time, I'll believe it was just an illusion...
In time, I'll believe it was only a dream...
Till then, I will breathe you in from the ocean,
And walk with the waves rolling under my feet...

I hope with all my heart that this is not what will be written about us. I hope that this ending is still far off, and there is still some more of our story for us to live out. I hope in time we'll both look back at these times and be glad they're over, having only strengthened us. I hope this is not how you want to write our ending. I hope we can still believe there will be no ending to this fairy tale we've been living.

Delerium – Just a Dream

Beautiful Worlds

Another day I've decided to mark with a song. I've known this particular tune for quite some time now, but it never made so much sense till now. The feeling is exhilarating...

You sacrifice time, money, and willpower... You put them all into helping others. And you know, in time you will get back ten-fold. Where will you be when it all comes back to you? Give joy. Make somebody's day. Be there for them. And they will surely apreciate. Be somebody's shoulder to cry on. Give a hug to someone who's sad. Be a friend.

This last weekend, was marked by the Local Training Seminar in AIESEC Iasi. It's not my first time, which makes it even more special. Because this time around, I could apreciate it for what it truly holds. It's been a year. And I haven't grown older. I've grown wiser. All the new faces around me must have looked just like I did one year past. At points, discussion got pretty emotional. Because we came to certain realisations that were not kind. Growing up is not kind. You don't choose to grow. You're forced into it. And as you struggle upwards you need to pick a path. And whatever path you take, life drags you after it. You can't stop, stand and stare. It all rushes past you, picks you up and throws you further. You're a straw in a wild bending stream.

What makes each of our flows special must be our approach. The bends we take along the way, and the other straws we touch. The nudges we give them into one direction or another. Because when your turn comes to fall into the ocean, all that will be left of you, will be the peers you've influenced.

I've met a lot of great people, and found out that people I've known for a year are great, even though I never got the chance to apreciate them for what they are. Now I know what the speaches we were given last year ment. Because I felt the same about the newies as did the oldies of me back in the day. AIESEC Iasi has a great future ahead. And I plan to be a part of it for as long as I can.

So that's what this song means to me... Determination, perseverence, motivation, reaching higher, and higher, without any limit. Because your bounds are your own, and where you stop is a matter of choice, not potential.

ATB – Beautiful Worlds

Let Go

I don't know how or why, but everytime I gain somethig, there's always a song that I notice for the first time on that day. I might have heard it before, but it never felt quite right, probably. So it was today, once again.

It was a really hard day, given it was a Sunday. I had to wake up at 7 (which is totally inhuman by my standards, not to mention for a week-end), to prepare a training I was to hold for some 20 Medicine students. All and all, the best part of it was, this was my first training for a real live audience.

Turns out, that it went better than expected. All the feedback was positive, everybody was happy, and that made me in turn very satisfied. So _yes_ it was worth the shorter sleep. Sleep is overrated, anyway.

But that wasn't all. Two hours out of the training, I was about to teach something else. It was set that I was to introduce a girl to parkour. It was not going to be the first time I did this (she's the 3rd, actually), but the weather was a bit cloudy and I had doubts she would pull it together and show up.

She did show up, and to the surprise of everybody training today, she performed far better than expected and left a very good impression. Time will tell how she will do, and I can only hope that she will keep her interest, for she shows real promise.

I know this post is less like the others, but this time it had to be more personal. This song was the song of my day. And thus it shall go down as: the joy of teaching others, the fullfillment of being good for the benefit of not only yourself but also of others. And it's not totally altruism, because it makes me feel good everytime (telling somebody that one time before yielded the title of 'hedonist' on me).

Paul van Dyk – Let Go (feat. Rea Garvey)

Come Inside

Warm up!... you know it's important. Move slowly, let your juices get to flowing... Let your body get used to what is to come... Experience inside you the calm before the storm.

Move! Those obstacles are not there to stop you... they are _your_ way of getting around. You are fast... you are flow. So what if they stare at you? They don't understand. They still think others can tell them which way to go. You can go wherever you want. It's your freedom, experience it any way you want. Don't let others tell you what and how to do.

Breathe... let your body draw in more than air. Breathe in your surroundings, and let them be a part of you. Then go for that big jump. Leap faithfully, because you know your body will do it. Instinct takes over... there's nothing to go wrong. Falling only exists so you can get back up.

Let loose... feel every instant of your existence, and know for certain that life always goes your way. Take a heading and follow it, don't let anything bar your path.

And when you get there, run past, to a new destination...

The Chemical Brothers – Come Inside

Suburban Train

Morning... Work... Routine... Cadence... It's all the same... any day; _every day_ ... All the same.

Why would today be different? It's just the same. Looking out the subway train window, all you see is the damp darkness of the tunnel. As you turn your gaze back to stare at the dirty floor, the corner of your eye catches the first glimpse of sunrise, as the train exits into the light. And you stare back... Blinded by the glow, your eyes make out shapes of ethereal angels dancing in the dust and shadows.

Then you adjust... The same monotony takes over again. The fleeting instant of light is now part of your average, ordinary day.

And again, down into a tunnel, dark and lonesome.

Today _could_ be different. Today _can_ be different. You can make it your own style. Choose your attitude...

With that thought in mind, the bright morning sun blinds you again, this time it's familiar, yet far more elaborate. Your heart swells with the joy of the sunrise... and this time you _know_ for certain today, like everyday you get, is beautiful... Dark and light mixing together, blending into each other, it all averages out to how _you_ CHOOSE to see it.

It's your choice... you get to pick how you want to live the day. Make it count.

Tiësto - Suburban Train

Free

I needed to... It was too much. You were too much... much, much more than I could have hoped for... yet still...

I needed to remember... now I know again... I know how it feels to be alone. I miss you!

So, you've found somebody... to replace me... but you know,... you know oh, so well, there will never be anybody quite like me. You'll never find somebody to share what we've shared.

I never wanted for us to part ways. I just wish you would have understood me. You were my cage... I needed to spread my wings wide, and I never could,... not with you. Now, I've flown away... I just wish it hadn't ended like this. There should have been more to it! There was more to us... not anymore...

Free... Alone...

Sarah Brightman – Free

Goodnight and Go

I've only just met you... It' hasn't been all that long. But... you just feel so right. Why? Why now? Why me? Why you, for that matter? *sigh*

And it was all starting to go back to just being me. Now you... You have me so hypnotized. And... as if it's not bad enough, you appear to be all I ever wanted. You're not perfect! You can't be! I won't let you. Not unless you're _my_ perfect... not unless you're with me!

C'mon, give me some more of your time... more of your words... more of you! How can it be? Why is it that you get me, oh, so well? You weren't supposed to... ! You shouldn't have... ! I shouldn't! But I just don't trust myself when I'm with you.

Be mine! I want you, though I shouldn't. I hate that I like you so much, but... I just can't bring myself to reject anything that's you.

Imogen Heap – Goodnight and Go

Ten Seconds Before Sunrise

Silence... as your senses come to, you feel a cadence... waves... washing on the wet shore's sand...

You squint open your eyes, and gaze at the horizon. A faint orange glow is rising above the dark waters. You feel cold, but you don't shiver. Midsummer, you know it will get warmer. You trust in the sun to light and heat you. You're not cold...

As you get to your feet, you feel the first light of dawn upon your face and into your eyes. In the distance, seagulls fly erratically above the water. It's so peacefull... But you know,... you know... it's just the calm before the storm - you won't be alone for long... it won't be this quiet for long... and soon the sun will light up the shore. As the water catches on fire in the distance, you shake off the sand that appears to have slipped into the very fabric of your being.

Another day, the sun is up, rise and shine! time to make it count.

Tiësto – Ten Seconds Before Sunrise